Sunday, May 05, 2019

The long and the short of it

She couldn't believe the question was serious, let alone playing any part in producing her final average: "What makes tall people better?"

The boy smirking at my daughter as he relayed the high school social studies assignment was understandably giddy. He towers over her, and she's made no secret of her sensitivity about being short.

"Let me guess ... they don't have a comparing or contrasting essay topic on the befits of being small?" she asks wearily.

"Nope," he says, pronouncing the P with a deep-cheek pop for emphasis.

I could only sigh when she retold the story after she'd plunked down in the car and grabbed for the seatbelt.

These assignments, it seems, haven't really changed much.

When I was her age, I had a teacher who once separated students into groups by eye color and hair color  ... making the brunettes among us suppose (as if we hadn't already) that the blue-eyed blondes were more likable ... more intelligent ... more likely to get the office with a good view and window and just about everything a person could want out of life.

The rest of us, she said quite theatrically, "might not amount to much at all." Her only solace for us was "Just be glad you're not a ginger … those reds are mentally unstable and more likely to wind up institutionalized."

I don't need to ask why some still teach this way. But I often wonder.

Our differences make for interesting discussions, and the anecdotes seem to stay with us even as we pull off the bandage, hair and all, and admit that we all feel the same pain of being outside looking in.

I used to they think they showed us these things to alert us to our own prejudices, but I've come to wonder if we haven't merely reinforced them. 


All one needs to do is Google from their phone to get the essay started: 

A 2014 University of Edinburgh study finds a small correlation between height and higher IQ. The Scottish university also noted that shorter women had a higher risk for dementia and diabetes than taller women … though shorter women tend to live the longest.

The Atlantic reports that tall people earn on average about $800 a year more than short-statured people.

Few US presidents have been short, and the average hight for CEOs is about six feet.

And who gets picked last for teams?

My short kid raises her hand.

I tell her she should reject the premise. Cross-examine how all these correlations are linked to causation? Remind them how the studies might be small … or on mice … or not replicated … or intrinsically biased.

You can ask them whether they think it is fair? Ask them how do we change it?

She's looking at me with that specific look that most teens give their parents … the one that says "You must be new here."

"Well … the long and the short of it is this: Maybe if I were taller they'd listen."

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