Not my first Roto-Rooder-o

The People for Less Unrest in Marriage (or PLUM), an entirely imaginary and long-dormant think tank of which I have found myself a spokesperson, and now its descendant entity, People for Less Unrest in Municipal Parenting (or PLUMP), would like to share the following announcement:

Never be the one to say, “I told you so.”

You may think it quite a bit. You may even go as far as writing it on pieces of scrap paper you will burn in ritual protest over the backyard fire pit as your family roasts marshmallows that will inevitably gum up strands of their hair - but you should never say those four little words aloud. Even if you think them to be cheap words to work into casual conversation.

Even when the parties you so told disregard all that sage advice and come to see the error of their ways, you don't get to be smug. It's a bad look on everyone, and it could be costly.

So what if it's going to be cold later? You don't have to be the defender of people who should bring sweaters.

Is it really necessary to follow weather predictions to their logical conclusions? Pfffft! Runners should know not to go out during thunderstorms. And couch potatoes should know to charge their phones. 

Though playing Battleship by candlelight for old times' sake (and to ward off boredom) might be one of the things you use in future arguments about unplugging, but I wouldn't. I Told You Sos can be sneaky that way, too.

There is not a person in the world who doesn't know they've stepped in something awful until Captain Obvious pointed it out.

Personally, my favorite time to lob an I Told You So, is when the kitchen sink drain starts to slow and the person who is most likely to tinker with things refuses to call a plumber.

Since this is not my first Roto-Rooder-o, I know there's a backup in the lines that no manner of lye-based products left to marinate at sink level will solve. We've already taken the plunger and exhausted the extent of its effectiveness. 

But Tinkering Partner will need to try.

Tinkering Partner may also attempt to curtail Operations Management's insistence that two functions - say hand washing dishes and machine washing clothes - can (and should) be able to happen simultaneously.

This is where you can stand your ground by doing nothing, letting the standing water speak for itself. Eventually, (and from experience) I'd say we're only a few days out from Suds on the Floor behind the Washer as the Triggering Event to an Actual Solution.

This is when an I Told You So can go so horribly wrong.

Because the intricacies of ancient plumbing may be lost on such a person, not to mention the cost of professional intervention.

As maybe Tinkering Person spending an afternoon in a basement up to their elbows in effluvium, is the best thing after all.

As long as he doesn't say, I told you we didn't need a plumber.